A comfort or a curse?

I told my best friend about running into T and his wife on Sunday, and she asked me if I felt that seeing him again was a comfort or a curse.  

A comfort or a curse?  I hadn't thought of it that way. 

Have you ever seen The Thornbirds (Movie) or Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV Show)?  

In The Thornbirds, I always thought the man and woman were fools.  He (the priest) didn't have a person in his life he would hurt if he chose to be with the woman he loved.  But he was a priest, so he refrained.  The woman just loved this stupid priest and wouldn't really move on with her life.  At the time, I thought they were both amazingly irritating and stupid!  But I can understand now how they were unable to truly move on.  If they had been on separate parts of the planet and didn't ever see each other maybe it would have been easier for them.

In Buffy, Angel (the vampire with a soul) would lose his soul if he ever experienced true joy.  Therefore, he couldn't be with the woman he loved (Buffy) because he would lose his soul (this was a gypsy curse).  I feel a lot like Angel in this situation ... if I experience true joy with T, I will lose my soul.  Yes, I think seeing him again is a little like a curse ... an incredibly cruel joke that the universe has decided to play on me at this time in my life when I'm with Dean, and I love Dean, and we have a great marriage.  

If this had happened when Dean and I were having serious problems, this would be a no-brainer.  But Dean and I are in a good place.  

Dammit!  I want my cake and eat it too!  And I'm seriously, completely, and devastatingly in love with this particular cake.